33.

I am not afraid of my own two feet
I will stand on them, without your support
Silly you to think I need your approval
You tell me I am backwards
You think I am foolish
You speak to me with such distaste
You laugh at my very words
but you never reach the core
my faith is ok
my strength is still intact
my love will always stay
yet you think
your words
will change me

nope

still waiting

32.

My vocabulary cannot enlighten you how I feel

deep within my mind

Your simple little actions have been pulling me in

I am becoming terrified of falling deep

All I ask you is to let me go

if you’re not as deep as me

For I am unable to handle heartache 

31.

your smile is what I crave

in my inner most thoughts 

I see your eyes glazing into mine

and for the one trivial second

I am able to view your genuine components of your

soul

I understand now when people say a breathe of fresh air

Honey you’re far more superior

wishing for the conclusion is the only thing I am capable of

I am afraid of you seeing your very importance 

Then walking away and heading for something more

equivalent your very own virtue

30.

For I shall never trust my unspoken feelings
because I have seen the darkness you offer
I am unable to be your light
for my darkness is far darker
If you love me
it shall be ok
but me to love you
would take generations
my heart built those walls
and they shall never fall...
true to my promise I will be
I do apologize that you shall pay
the unfair price
because my past lover made
me so weak
I can't not risk it
The closer I find myself towards you
the hardest I try to run
When will you see the inner shell of me
then you shall understand the reasons
why you shouldn't love someone like
me

29.

Sometimes I feel like a sponge..
 I soak up everyone else pain..
And never let mine show..
Maybe I am too strong for my own good..
Maybe I am just to willing to fight others battles..
 Maybe i just too innocent to see the bad within others..
Maybe I am just a little girl wide eyed and so full of life..
Just knowing that maybe I can just change everything with smile

28.

Eating evil.

I am a thin-a-holic unlike alcoholics

I must contact food everyday

I must consume something everyday

But

I create myself as an adolescent

Comparing emaciated and portly people

Because this what the man has turned me into

According to your standards of existing I am

Simply miserable repulsive foul

Finally

unclean

Person because

I carry on my back these love handles

Along with the scars from my past

 That I spend days months years

Trying to obliterate to my very core

I once too stood over a scale

Poking slap beating my very own skin

Until it was forced to fall to the very ground

Membrane and skeleton I became…

Then and there I felt

Simply miserable repulsive foul and finally

unclean little fragile girl merged

With every pound drop

A piece of my soul became absent

When I finally became who I wanted to be

I misplaced more then I will ever acquire

These scars will never repair

Open wounds are apparent

And simple joke can send me into a whirlwind

 Of crash diets and counting calories

Until I reach the soulless being of my past

27.

lost from within
knowing that life is what
it will always be
simple and sweet
my words might be
and ending this pain
I shall bare...